Forgiving and Forgetting

Have you ever questioned or doubted yourself because of a particular situation? Or negative situations that have been thrown at you from all directions? Well, stop because it’s not you.

No one in this world is perfect. What does perfect even mean? Is there really such a thing as the perfect person? No. We have threaded our way through life, doing the best we know-how.

Sure, we all have weaknesses that get the best of us at times, but for the most part, we really are doing the best we know-how. And yet, after all, we have done, we still feel as though we are underachieving and not falling into the consistently perfect department.

That is because there is no such thing as the perfect department. We individually have our own perfections which may or may not be compatible with someone else, but that DOES NOT! Mean you are not good enough or worthy.

So we again shift our attention, and take another look at the goals that we have set for ourselves, and step out on our own paths to success. We should be pursuing all the paths to success that we can possibly handle because that is the way we also develop our complete potential.

The important thing is that we are willing to acknowledge our mistakes and make course corrections as needed. That is the best we can do. That is the most we can do.

Nothing more can be expected of us as we continue threading our pathway through life, but through this, this is where we find the true path to happiness, knowing that our consciences are clean and you’ve done everything within your power to save particular friendships or relationships.

It should make us feel better about ourselves but like myself, it’s easy to pick away at the details why? How? What did I do wrong? When you know in your heart that the true answer is NOTHING! That is the most we can expect of our partner/friend too.

To make a union work, in the long term, we need to be willing to forgive and forget. We all say things in heated arguments that we don’t mean, to attack one another with our words. It’s part of human nature.  Sometimes it may even seem justifiable. Sometimes relationships/friendships need some drama to help the bond grow even stronger.

Agreed, that sometimes forgiving and forgetting is not always an easy thing to do. It’s never meant to be easy. Some things our partners/ friends do may sting and hurt us badly. But in the long run, the best thing to do is move onward.

It helps to take a step away for a few minutes, hours, days, weeks, months, and even years sometimes before revisiting and attempting to rebuild. It isn’t uncommon for this to happen coincidently and completely unintentionally. It happens all the time and time is a great healer.

We have two choices: stay or leave. Was the situation really so bad that you have to consider these two options? Is the damage done to our hearts really so deep and irreparable that it can never go away? The answer with friendship and companionship is no. Sometimes it shows that people actually care even if we can’t always see it.

Things can always be fixed forgiven and forgotten. “What doesn’t kill only makes us stronger” right? After a long-term relationship, however, these can be especially difficult to fix to more or less even impossible after a long break leaving room for other people to fill the gaps in each of your lives.

It is important to remember that it is always a two-way 50/50 effort when trying to fix these bonds. Talking and finding the common ground is always key and testament to successfully forgiving and forgetting.

Only you can decide the answer to that. Was it really that bad, or are we just unwilling to forgive and forget? Ponder the true gravity of the situation. Keep in mind, that to leave means total life changes, and they do not always turn out for the best. Sometimes, of course, they can, in the case of leaving a truly abusive situation. But is your partner sincere in their efforts to change? Do their “fruits” prove the pudding? Or is the saying “A leopard never changes its spots?”

To forgive and forget means to let it go and rebuild and not let silly things be dominant over that. We may be justified in being somewhat cautious in our actions, allowing them ample time and space to prove themselves. We also need to work on the “forgetting” part. That means, simply, that we do not continue to dredge up the past when it seems to support our “position”.

We need to say we’re sorry and makeup which most of the time is possible and we can correct the errors of our ways and our mistakes. Think of what positive things can potentially come from a negative situation. It’s better when we acknowledge it this way.

Happiness is everywhere. Just most of the time we can’t see it but that doesn’t mean it isn’t there and it doesn’t exist. The negative paths we follow from time to time will never turn up Joy. Joy and happiness can only be found on the pathways of forgiveness and moving forward with our lives.